FAQ

Here are some Question Answer

Simply stated, counselling is any relationship in which one person is helping another person to better understand and solve some problem. Counselling is essentially a change (growth: healing) process in which you are helped to:
  • deepen awareness of past & present patterns and explore alternatives.
  • express yourself in a safe, supportive, collaborative, non-judgmental climate.
  • identify, sort-out and clarify your attitudes and feelings.
  • identify non-helpful patterns.
  • learn, where appropriate, more helpful coping skills.
  • identify and achieve goals that are important to you.
The ultimate goal for counselling is to help you to recognize and accept your own internal worth and to live in a way in which head, heart and hand work together, where your thoughts feelings and actions flow harmoniously in the world and where challenges are accepted and overcome with confidence.
Our first meeting will be a consultation in which we can explore your present situation and discuss your needs and concerns regarding therapy. You can then decide whether it would be appropriate for you to enter therapy at this time, and if so what kind of therapy and approach we can use for your specific concerns and whether or not we would like to work together.
You can contact me by e-mail or phone to arrange an initial consultation.
Counselling may be for you if you are feeling anxious, depressed, or unfulfilled in any sense and nothing seems to help. You may have tried to cope with your problems on your own but may be finding it hard to deal with them right now. Counselling can help you develop the necessary coping skills and can provide you with a set of new strategies you can apply to make your problem manageable.
After an initial consultation session lasting 50 minutes you may have a better idea of whether you would like to continue with the work. This will also allow me to assess whether I feel I can help you. If we agree to continue I will suggest an initial contract of six sessions to explore the issues you want to work with and which will also give us time to build a strong respectful therapeutic relationship. Thereafter we can agree an open-ended or a more time limited contract with regular reviews of how we are progressing along the way.
It is perfectly ok for you to come and explore things. I often have clients who either are unsure why they have come or have so many reasons that they cannot pin down any one issue. Part of our work would then be to explore and clarify what the issues are and discus how we might work with them. Alternatively we might decide that counseling was not appropriate at this time.
All personal information is treated in the strictest confidence and remains confidential to the counsellor. This is crucial for you to feel able to trust the process, knowing that it is safe to talk openly about what is happening. This strict confidentiality rule would only be broken, in most cases with your consent, should exceptional circumstances arise where you might be in danger of serious harm to yourself or others. This policy is in accordance with the code of ethics of the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy BACP.
One of the most difficult steps in counselling occurs before you even see a counsellor for the first time. Deciding to seek counselling is the first step in change. Once this decision has been made, the mechanics for change have been set in motion. In the process of changing the way you think, feel, or behave, you may try out new ways of doing things. This can make you anxious or frustrated. Also, in the course of counselling you may come to realize that things you once thought of only in a positive or negative way you may see a bit differently. The challenges of pushing on your limitations may also cause you frustration, but with commitment and practice, you will find that you can stretch your limits and find new and exciting aspects of your self.
Sessions last 50 minutes. Extended sessions can be accommodated as necessary.
A good ending is an important part of the counseling process. For this reason it is advisable that we allow at least three weeks notice prior to finishing in order to explore what the ending will mean and how you can draw on support and strength both internally from your own resources and by reaching out to others. In a sense the journey continues beyond the counseling situation but now you have the insight and resources yourself to deal with the inevitable challenges of life.
There is a set fee per session. Reduced rates may be available depending on your circumstances.
SHAME

Deep, unhealthy shame is the internal feeling that we are useless or dirty or flawed as a person; that we are just not good enough. Shame can often result in low self-esteem. People living with underlying shame may believe these feelings are normal, and may think other people feel the same way. While these feelings may be quite common, they are not the norm, and can impede fulfilling our happiness.

What is anxiety?​
Anxiety is a normal part of all human processes. It exists for most people in situations that are new, challenging, dangerous, etc. If our anxiety level increases enough, we may become apprehensive and notice physiological effects like increased heart rate. In most situations, anxiety is normal and healthy, and not something that needs to be treated. However, sometimes healthy anxiety in situations such as giving speeches can rise to unhealthy (painful) levels.
What is anger?​
Simply put, anger is an emotion like all other emotions. Emotions are signposts into our internal structure. It’s simply something we feel.
Self- Esteem​
Self image is how we see ourselves, and how we think others see us. Self image plays a HUGE role in how we behave and feel.
Defence Mechanisms​
When one door closes another opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.
Depression
Depression is very common – one in five people become depressed at some point in their lives. Anyone can get low at times, but someone is said to be suffering from depression when these feelings don’t go away quickly or become so bad they interfere with their everyday life.
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